I miss you

So this is going to sound super lame, but I miss you. The limited people that have access to this were my best friends at school. This past week I've been missing every single one of you.

I'm probably just going through the winter blues or whatever, but I've been thinking lately. I never had a problem making friends before. There were always people I disliked, people I tolterated, and people I liked. Super simple. I was never short of people I liked. Ever. But now, I feel like everyone I know down here in VA is just alright. There's no one I really consider a good friend. They are all aquaintences, mostly from work, who I force myself to socialize with so I don't die of boredom.

Now, I think part of this comes from the fact that all my life I have been surrounded by people my own age in similar environments. It's almost as if we grow up in vaccums. I went from grade school to college to summer camps to vacations to army schools to whatever. No matter where I was I was always in an enviroment where people were forced to bond with each other.

It is probably different for many of you, being back at home where you still have some old friends, or even in a workplace that fosters more of a "young professional" attitude. But for me, I feel like I am more alone than I have ever been. Practically everyone I work with is married and substantially older. I have made it an effort on my part to seek out other LTs to hang out with. And while I have slowly compiled a group of around 7 "friends." I would never call a single one of them to talk or anything. Basically I am using them so I have someone to go out with, although there isn't really anywhere to go.

It's just kind of depressing.